Saturday, March 28, 2020

Monumental Heartbreak

I made it through Viridian Forest to Pewter City safely. The Pewter Pokémon Gym was open and available, but Lucky was in no condition to train there. Instead we made daily forays into the forest to train against other Caterpie and Weedle. Eventually Lucky evolved into a Metapod which was amazing to watch. At the time, I was so excited to see an evolution first hand. It was the direct result of our diligent training together and it felt great to see Lucky move into his next life stage, growing stronger before my eyes. This physical manifestation of growth and improvement encouraged me to take our training to the next step. It encouraged me to take my team to the Pewter City Pokémon Gym.
I walked in headstrong and confident that my team was ready to face the challenges ahead. I announced myself as a challenger. I waited for the trainers representing the gym to step forward. I expected to face more than one young man before challenging Gym Leader Brock, but apparently this young trainer was the only one representing Brock that day. He only had two Pokéballs at his side, but he assured me I was no match for Brock. He was about to prove it to me firsthand.
He tossed out a Diglett which popped up out of the dirt floor of the gym. Kiwi took to the air. If the Diglett knew any ground attacks they would be wasted on Kiwi while he remained airborne. Kiwi opened with our classic Sand-Attack gambit to kick as much dust and dirt up into the Diglett's eyes as he could. Kiwi took a few scrapes as he wore down the Diglett's accuracy, but eventually the Diglett was completely ineffective. I switched in Nibbles to tackle the Diglett into submission.
The Junior Trainer revealed his final Pokémon to be a Sandshrew. Its defense was formidable so I used Nibble to distract him with a series of disorienting glares before pulling Nibble out of the battle. Rascal jumped in to eagerly sweep through the defenseless Sandshrew, but I miscalculated. After two vicious slashes from the Sandshrews sharp claws, Rascal was down and out. Rascal slumped to the ground unconscious. My heart sank into my stomach and I felt faint. I failed Rascal.
It was in that moment of horrible defeat that it occurred to me that I should have used a potion on Rascal. I shouldn't have let him suffer those two powerful attacks head on. I should have sent in Kiwi to wear down the Sandshrew's accuracy. Lucky didn't stand a chance against this Pokémon if it took out Rascal so easily. Kiwi was my only chance to get out of this mess. I knew that if I didn't keep my head in the game, I might be saying goodbye to more than one Pokémon that afternoon. I tried to shake off my sorrow and focus on the battle ahead.
Kiwi was much faster than the Sandshrew. He kept firmly out of reach and launched a series of quick attacks on the Sandshrew to finish it off. The Junior Trainer conceded defeat, but it was I who felt defeated that day. This young boy had no idea I'd just recently vowed to never fight my Pokémon to the point of unconsciousness. Now, just days after determining the way I wished to train and respect Pokémon, my resolve was going to be tested. Rascal and I would have to part ways.
I explained this to the trainer who didn't quite understand, but he said the gym would be happy to watch after Rascal for me. Rascal was always enthusiastic about training and living here at the gym would be a fitting end to our relationship, so I agreed.
I took Rascal to the Pokémon Center and waited for him to recover from his injuries. I don't really know if he understood, but I explained to him that in order for us to grow stronger I would need to let him go. We had to follow different paths, now. I had chosen a training style where I would not let my Pokémon fall in battle and even though Rascal was my very first Pokémon companion, I could not go back on my conviction. We said our goodbyes. I released Rascal to the care of the Junior Trainer at the Pewter City Pokémon Gym and withdrew my challenge.

It's an understatement to say that I was devastated. In that moment, I certainly regretted making it my personal goal as a trainer to not push my Pokémon too far. As Wolf had said, it's just part of the training to the average trainer. You win some and you lose some. But that just wasn't my way. I wanted to build a place where I could protect Pokémon and people would come from all around to study and understand them better. I had to be better than the average trainer. I had to hold myself to a higher standard. Pokémon would fight. They would fight to protect me in the wild, and they would fight for my dream in competitive matches. But I had to have limits. I had to take responsibilities for my failures and this was the only way I knew how to do that.
Rascal was the first of many such failures, and saying goodbye to my first Pokémon was certainly one of the most painful experiences as a Pokémon Trainer that I have ever faced. Back in those days in Pewter City, I questioned everything about my journey. I spent a long time just wondering if I should return to Professor Oak and give up. These thoughts just stemmed from the profound sadness and disappointment, though. Ultimately, I would move on. I would grow stronger and persevere.
Beyond the tremendous heartbreak of failing to protect my first Pokémon, I was also terrified of Brock. This failure humbled me tremendously. Everything I did going forward would be taken slowly and with greater attention to strategy. This included returning to challenge Brock. Without Rascal, my team had a gaping hole that needed to be filled. The only one who could fill that hole was Lucky and so we left Pewter temporarily to train like our lives depended on it. I would absolutely not lose another Pokémon in this city.

Current Team:

WOODEN HOUSE + DOWNLOAD + TOUR + CC CREATORS | The Sims 4 |



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Against Awards Shows


Image by Marco Recuay. Filed under Creative Commons. Some rights reserved. Source: Flickr


Another day, another controversy explodes on the Internet. Controversies, and the obsessive social media coverage that they receive have become almost synonymous with award shows. Why, with Kayne's arrogant interruption of Taylor Swift, Miley Cyrus desperately trying to shock at the Video Music Awards, Ellen DeGeneres making an awful transvestite joke about Liza Minnelli at the Oscars, or Sofia Vergara's irony at the Emmys taken too seriously, we tend to forget that these shows are about the awards. It seems almost routine that these shows always provoke some controversy to tweet or blog about ad nauseaum. It's just so fascinating that in a post-Madonna age, liberal and conservative alike can still be offended, and even "outraged" (a terribly misused term), by a woman shaking her ass on TV.


I have the misfortune (or fortune, rather) of missing out on these controversies that will distract journalists from otherwise newsworthy stories, because I don't watch award shows. I don't see the point. They're really a waste of time, if you think about it, and I'm briefly going to articulate exactly why.



You're an observer, not a participant

I didn't get to vote in The Dark Knight for Best Picture. I didn't get to nominate Legend Of Korra: Book 2 for a Golden Globe. I'm not getting an award because I wasn't involved in any of the shows, nor are any of my friends and family. These decisions are all made by persons I'll probably never know. Of course, popularity can have an influence on the choices of those in charge, but the verdict ultimately lies with them. So why should I be involved? Why should I care? What good does it do for me?

Is it for validation? Can you only feel justified in liking art if it wins an award? I'll love Breaking Bad, regardless if it wins Best Drama. I'll abhor Gigi, even though it won Best Picture. I'll still listen to the Airborne Toxic Event, even if they never earn a Grammy. You should like art for reasons important to you, not to society, or those who claim to speak for it.

Or do you watch these shows to see artists that you admire finally get their due recognition? Well, that's fine and all, but chances are, you'll see other artists that you don't know or care about get their fair due as well. Think about it, do you really care about who wins Best Sound Editing at the Oscars? In most cases, the person or show you'll want to win, will only catch the spotlight for less than five minutes, and that's even if they win.

Yes, yes, and yes. I know that the People's Choice Awards, the Teen's Choice Awards, and the Kid's Choice Awards allow the public to vote online, and they deserve credit for that. However, that still doesn't fix the problem of sitting through so much boredom. (Well, the Kid's Choice Awards have slime, at least!) It's still people getting awards. No plot, no climax. Not to mention that you can't choose who gets nominated (as far as I know.) That being said, these viewer participation awards don't always select the best of choices, after all, One Direction won Favorite Band for 2014. It is also noteworthy that Whitney Pastorek of Entertainment Weekly suggested that public's participation may be more marginal than advertised,

"Let's be honest: As the very clear post-show disclaimer explained, a complex system of "E-Polls" and market research and extravagant math went into choosing the nominees you saw upon your screen. And that system led to a telecast in which praise was lavished on a crassly commercial cross-section of demographically advantageous properties starring celebrities who were willing to show up." ("The People's Choice Awards: You showed up? Here's a trophy!").

By the end of the day, you're watching people you'll never know hand each other awards for two to four hours. Awards that you, likely, had no real effort in giving.You're only real participation is as a view count.

Much of what's going on might not even be that relevant to you

Kelly Clarkson, Rihanna, Taylor Swift, Robin Thicke, Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, and Beyonce are among the musical artists most represented by the Grammys as of late. This is one of the reasons I can't watch the Grammys, I don't listen to any of the new artists. Spinal Tap sounds better than a lot of what reaches Billboard these days. Now I'm not one of those retrophiles who hates new music simply because it's new. I love Nujabes, Airborne Toxic Event, DJ Okawari, and I even think that Kyary Pamyu Pamyu is a little catchy. The singles "Rolling In The Deep" by Adele and "One Engine" by The Decemberists are excellent, while The Foo Fighters' Wasting Light was a great rock album. Simply because I don't particularly like any of the artists who often win Grammys doesn't make me better than those who do, it simply means that the Grammys aren't for me.

I referenced part of this problem earlier. Even if an artist I enjoyed was getting recognition, I'd have to wade through a bunch of other artists who I don't care for just to get there. The Video Music Awards may supposedly represent my generation, but they don't represent all of us. 

This even happens with the high-brow Academy. After all, how many of you actually saw Slumdog Millionaire, Nebraska, An Education, The Reader, or Michael Clayton before they were nominated for Oscars? Though, yes, these awards can help bring public attention to those lesser known films (which is a good thing), but again, is it necessary to watch the show just to get that? I think the press releases, critical reviews, and film festivals can get that much accomplished.

Don't even get me started on the Tony's. I know that I couldn't afford to see all of those shows on Broadway. Could you?

All of the results will be available online after the show.

I've hinted at this point before, but it needs repeating.

It's not as if, if you miss the show or forget to record it that you'll never get the results. You could easily save hours out of your evening and just get the results from Google. That's what it's all about, isn't it? The results: who won and who lost. Still want to see acceptance speeches or performances? Fine, look them up on YouTube. See how much time you've saved.

Again, I don't see the larger point in watching these award shows, you really get nothing out of it, aside from a chance to drool over your favorite celebrities. There's a channel for that, it's called TMZ, but I wouldn't recommend that you watch it.

I recognize that this essay has been rather, well, short, compared to my others, and I suppose it's because I don't feel the need to waste too much ink on convincing the Average Joe that watching celebrities congratulate each other is something that we see every day. No need to turn it into a televised event. That's just masturbation.


Bibliography:

"One Direction Wins Favorite Band At People's Choice Awards 2014" Perez Hilton. January 9, 2014. www.perezhilton.com

Pastorek, Whitney.  "The People's Choice Awards: You showed up? Here's a trophy!" Entertainment Weekly. January 8, 2009. popwatch.ew.com



Monday, March 23, 2020

Storium Theory: Limiting Your Limitations

Today, I'd like to write a bit about something that I think we all do as narrators from time to time: Limiting the options that players have for writing about a situation.

Limits are good. Limits, at their base, are a way of ensuring that the scene has focus. When we set up a challenge at all, we are putting limits on the scene in general - limits of saying "the scene is now about this problem, and it needs to be addressed." We're defining what the actual problem is, and to some extent unavoidably defining the sort of things that can be done to address the problem.

But it's important to recognize when we take these definitions too far.

I've been playing a roleplaying game outside of Storium recently, using some pre-prepared scenarios that I found, and I've been struck by something in reading those scenarios: Oftentimes, they focus extensively on what definitely won't work. They spend a lot of time discussing why the players should absolutely not try a particular tactic with a situation, and how many brick walls can be thrown in their way should they dare to attempt such a thing. They're not quite set up to allow only one path forward, but they dwell a lot on why solutions A, B, C, D, E, and F are all terrible ideas that will only increase the scenario's difficulty. They show the walls, not the paths forward.

I've noticed a similar mindset subtly sneaking into Storium games at times. In our challenge setups or narration, we can sometimes spend time focusing on what won't work - on the walls set up in the way of particular solutions. Maybe we show the player characters trying a solution and discovering it won't work in the opening narration. Maybe we just describe something as impossible on the card or in the outcomes or in the narration.

Sometimes, this is fine. Sometimes, this is appropriate.

But it is definitely something we should question.

Storium works best, I have found, when players have enough information to focus their writing without limiting their ideas. That is: The problem is well-defined, but the solutions are left as open as possible given the problem at hand.

If the problem is a powerful wizard who the heroes need to get past to get to their goal, the solutions could potentially involve all sorts of things - maybe the heroes manage to fight the wizard and drive him away, maybe they evade his attacks and race beyond him into the fortress. Sometimes, limiting those options is perfectly appropriate...but it's important to be careful just how far you take the limitations. For instance, it might be appropriate to say that the party has to fight the wizard, because he's set up a magical barrier over the exit or because it's just too dangerous with him raining magic around the area. But further defining that the wizard is absolutely invulnerable to non-magical attacks himself is probably going to take it too far - it'll most likely make players of non-magical characters struggle a bit to figure out how to participate in the fight. Or, alternately, it might be appropriate to say that the wizard can't be killed and the characters need to escape - the wizard is just too powerful and his defenses too strong. But it'd take it too far to say that his attacks are unstoppable and his defenses are so strong he can't even be shaken by the characters at all, most likely, because again, it seriously limits what players can write and the ideas they can come up with for the scene. Some characters might have things they can realistically write to make just running away interesting, but others might really need to be able to provide some cover for the others or manage to disrupt the wizard for just a moment (or at least, attempt to do so and get turned aside, if they're playing a Weakness).

Similarly, consider an investigation. Maybe you're asking players to find information on a criminal gang that has troubled the area. That's fine. But if you go to the extent of saying that the other gangs in the area definitely won't share their information, or that police contacts are totally mystified and have no knowledge of the gang at all, well, that's probably going to cause people some trouble. You're limiting the ways that players can write the scene, and that's likely to make it tougher for them to come up with ideas.

Remember: Storium is about helping people write. The things that you put in your narration should encourage writing, not oppose it.

That's not to say that you should totally avoid limitations. Yes, there are times that they fit the story. If it's expressly established that the gang is totally new to the area, for instance, it makes sense that the heroes might not be able to trust contacts that would be working from existing knowledge...but how are the heroes able to get the information? Word the challenge in such a way that you reveal the possibilities rather than set up the walls. And don't just give one option! Show a wider field of openings, something that lets the players still have room to get creative on their own.

And remember to ask yourself: What is this challenge actually about?

In the case of the gang, for instance: Is the question really about who the heroes are able to go to for the information they need? Or is it just about what they are able to find out? If the latter...does it really matter whether they are able to use their contacts with the police? Or is the question just about whether they find information about the gang in the first place?

I want to be clear: Sometimes it does matter how the players are able to accomplish something. Sometimes that can be a problem you need to address as narrator. Sometimes it can cause trouble for a plot if players are allowed to do things a certain way, even if that way fulfills the overall concept of the challenge. That's very true.

But not all the time.

Not even the number of times we as narrators think it is true.

So...when you're setting a challenge up, take a good look over the card and narration associated with it. Look over what you've written, and ask yourself:
  • Have I set up any limitations here I didn't intend to? Are there places where I suggest something is impossible where I didn't mean to?
  • Have I set up limitations that I intended to...but that on second thought, really don't matter? Are there places where I have put limits that will make my players struggle to write, rather than providing useful focus?
If the answer to any of those questions is "yes," think about what you can do to open things up for the players. You still want the challenge to be focused...but focused and limited are two very different things.

Friday, March 20, 2020

Alumni Sian Knight Begins Job With Fat Kraken Studios.

Congratulations to our Alumni, Siân Knight for landing a job as an environment artist with Fat Kraken Studios!

Sian said,
'I am absolutely pleased Alumni Sian Knight begins job with Fat Kraken Studios and honoured to announce that I will be working as an Environment Artist at Fat Kraken Studios, who are working alongside Oddworld Inhabitants to create their latest upcoming title - Oddworld: SoulStorm!! 😱
I would like to thank all of the people who have given me opportunities along the way ever since the start of this year - I've almost given up several times... but you've gotta' be vigilant! Never give up!'

That's great advice.

Go Girl!



























Thursday, March 19, 2020

Missed Classic: Trinity - Fly Me To The Moon

Written by Joe Pranevich



Trinity continues to impress and depress me. Last time out, we witnessed the unexpected destruction of New Mexico thanks to a more powerful than expected nuclear test at the Trinity site. My guess was that we had finally found the "plot" of this game: to find out what interfered with the original test and put it right again. Do we have a time-traveling saboteur? Could he be related to that voice that keeps whispering bad "gnomon" puns in my ear? I have no idea, but it feels good to finally be discovering the plot after so much semi-random exploration.

At this point, I am most of the way through. I've solved (perhaps) four of the seven areas including Kensington Gardens, the South Pacific atoll, the Siberian steppe, and Nagasaki. Still to be conquered are an outer space segment, an unknown area, and the Trinity test site itself. I also know that I need to find a lizard for a magic potion, recover a magnetic meteorite from an impact crater, and maybe even deal with an injured wight. When we do these "Missed Classics", we aim to close out games in three posts. I hope I am not disappointing too many people when I say that we will have this one and at least one more, depending on how writing about the endgame goes.
"Ice ice baby. (Too cold, too cold.)" - Rob Van Winkle

To recap a bit, last time around I attempted to explore the second mushroom but ended up transported into orbit and a very quick death. I worked out with some experimentation that I could ride a soap bubble from the "Bubble Boy" in the wabe through the mushroom door and this would make surviving in space possible, but even then I could not work out how to get to a satellite that I see whizzing by before my eventual death. Having given this some thought, I am convinced that the magnet rock is my best bet since that may allow the bubble to steer itself towards the satellite. I'm a little unsure of the specifics because it seems too small and the distance seems too great for this to actually work, but this is a game with a 40-foot tall boy blowing bubbles so I'm willing to suspend disbelief. Digging around the rock didn't work and I think that I need to cool the rock down somehow, but I do not know how.

My first thought was to carry water to it. We have ample water nearby in the river and bog, but no watertight container. You'd think the cottage would have a cup or something, but you'd be wrong. The only other water I can find is the frozen icicles on the ceiling of the ice cave. With some experimentation, I discover that I can throw the axe to knock one down! I also score one point, so I must be on the right track. Unfortunately, the ice melts quickly and there is no way to get it to the meteorite without it melting.

As puzzles go, this was fun since I realized very quickly that we had four turns before the icicle would melt. The time-box helped to narrow down where we had to explore and I realized that it would re-freeze if we take the icicle to the top of the triangle at the center of the world. From there, I can make it to the crater only if I follow the exact shortest path. Still, that is not hard considering my experience at adventure game mapping and I place the cold icicle on the hit rock. It sputters and steams a bit, but the end result is that I lose the icicle but gain a magnet rock. Score!


Worked about as well as Reaganomics. 

The Final Frontier

My thought from last week was that once I made it to the satellite, I could board it. I had in mind something like the ISS (which had not been invented yet in 1986) or a half-remembered scene from Moonraker (not yet a decade old at that point). The good news is that the magnetic rock took me to the satellite as I expected, but once there I found nothing to do. There was no airlock or entrance hatch, only an automated defense satellite and an oncoming nuclear missile. The voice in my ear managed a Star Trek pun ("where gnomon has gone before"), but that doesn't help much.

One thing that changed is that I am now on the satellite and it is firing maneuvering thrusters to position itself. In the process, we are getting closer and closer to the white door. This is good since it means a way out! This is bad once you remember that the white door is the location of a nuclear explosion and the fact that we are going towards it means that this satellite will likely be blown to bits soon. Just before the missile hits, when the white door is closest, I pop the bubble with my spade. Instead of being suicide, the sudden pressure forces me to spring towards and through the door before I die of exposure to the cold of space. I still accomplished nothing, but at least I know how to get back to the wabe. I try the sequence again and again to find anything that I missed, but come up empty. Whatever I am supposed to do there, I don't think I am doing it yet. I restore.


 
Skink: noun; a smooth-bodied lizard with short or absent limbs, typically burrowing
in sandy ground, and occurring throughout tropical and temperate regions.

Tunnel Vision

One low-point last week was that I could not find the third mushroom, despite the fact that I had found it and wrote about it a post or two before. What happened? It's a combination of my writing being behind my playing, but also because I simply didn't keep the whole game in my head. I forgot that I saw it there even though I had it in my notes. In my defense, I was certain that the ossuary was underground and there was no way a magic shadow could reach there. Let's just say that I could have explored this area a while ago if it had not been for this mistake.

Passing through the door, I emerge at the eastern end of a long dark tunnel. This also happens to be the end with a nuclear bomb that will no doubt explode in a few minutes. In classic text adventure style, there is a disused lantern on the ground that I grab. Exploring west, I discover a walkie-talkie and a skink. If you are like me, you may have no idea what a "skink" is and may have resorted to Google. If so, you would have learned that a skink is a variety of lizard. I finally found my lizard! Or rather, I had found him because he immediately rushes off to the west. Before engaging in pursuit, I muck around with the walkie-talkie by extending its antenna and listening to some static. The signal doesn't reach well into the tunnels and the only word that I can make out is "eight", although eight what will have to remain a mystery… but I'd better hurry.


"Earth below us / Drifting, falling / Floating, weightless / Calling, calling home"

Just to the west is the end of the line as the cave is sealed except for a tiny, lizard-sized crevasse. The skink runs there to hide immediately and I have no obvious way to get him out. This leads to a nifty little puzzle of "catch the skink" that goes something like this:
  • The skink will flee from light, either the splinter or the electric lamp that I found in the tunnel. He's like a peaceful grue in that respect. 
  • I can force him out of the crevice by dropping my splinter of wood in; it is too narrow to do the same with the lantern. Doing that causes him to race past me down the eastern tunnel I never see it again.
  • If I (after a restore) place the lit lantern in the next room and repeat, the skink runs there and then immediately back. He's disoriented by all of the lights so I can pick it up! 
  • Unfortunately, it wiggles out of hands nearly immediately although I get 1-2 turns to do something else with it. I try putting it in the bag and birdcage, but neither do the trick. 
  • With no other option, I resort to killing the skink in the brief time that I am able to hold it. Killing it is vividly described, down to the way that your hand aches as you choke the life out of its innocent lizard body. For all the implied death in this game, killing this creature-- that would die in minutes anyway-- hurts.
I race back through the door before the bomb explodes and take stock. I have to use the new lantern to pass the wight; much like in Zork, the lantern only lasts a few turns so I need to carefully turn it off and on when I need it. I drop the lizard carcass into the potion and… absolutely nothing happens. Did I need a fresh lizard? I play through the tunnel segment again and again but find no way to capture the lizard and keep it alive. I resort to taking a hint-- my first for this game. The answer is that I was supposed to put the lizard in my pocket! It had no problem escaping from a paper bag, but a pocket? Sure. When I place it inside, the lizard calms down and seems to be happy to be carried. I return to the cottage and drop it in, but the same "nothing" happens and I get no points. What am I getting wrong?


I should have listened to you!

I take a second hint and discover that I missed or misinterpreted one of the magpie's messages: "Killed in the light of a crescent moon." That is obvious in retrospect, but I did not connect it with the lizard in specific and forgot about it entirely until now. Since I have to murder my lizard, where can I find a crescent moon? The tunnel section could have been at night, but since killing it there didn't work I am going to guess not. All of the other time periods have been daylight hours. Thankfully, the answer is obvious since there is one area that I have not "won" yet: space!

I ride my bubble back to the final frontier and verify that the moon is in fact a crescent from my perspective. I murder the lizard with the same heart-wrenching scene, but at least I got points for it. I follow the rest of the puzzle as before to dock with the satellite, ride it back to the white door, and then pop the bubble just before orbital armageddon. (Speaking of which, why would they bother to have nuked orbit? The satellite that I was on seemed like it fired lasers at missiles as an orbital defense system. That part makes sense, but nuking it seems overkill since a laser-satellite would be just as destroyed if you fired a conventional missile at it. I guess when all you have are nuclear-powered hammers, everything looks like a nail.) I drop my freshly killed lizard into the cauldron and it begins to smoke and bubble. I leave quickly and the cottage explodes, leaving nothing but the charred remains of the book and maps plus one intact cauldron. At the bottom of the cauldron is my reward: a single emerald.


It's kryptonite without the aftertaste.

I check my list of open puzzles but I have just about reached the end. All that remains is helping the wight and heading off to Trinity, but alas I think my own pity for the injured wight is my own and not Moriarty's. What's left? Eventually, I notice the color of the two boots on "my" corpse are red and green, the same as the colors of the two jewels that I have been (knowingly or unknowingly) chasing after, a red ruby and a green emerald. I also recall that there are recesses in each boot where you could hide something, but I never found anything that fit. I stick my new emerald in the green boot and it is absorbed instantly. The boot seems to hum with newfound power and tiny wings sprout from the heel. What does that give me? Flight? Speed? I'll have to get the matched set to find out.

Following the same path in my previous post to disguise myself as a corpse to ride the ferry, I slip through the mushroom door to the Trinity site. Before I go, I have a small crisis that I have far too many objects to carry at once and no idea what I will need on the other side. Should I take the axe or the spade? The walkie-talkie? I will have to restore if I bought the wrong kit, but clearly knowing what to bring is part of the "fun". Once at Trinity, I wait for the guards to leave and meet up with the roadrunner at the bottom of the tower. He hands over the ruby and I install it into my other boot. I get the same message about hidden power and little wings but nothing else obviously happens… until I try walking north:

Woosh! Desert streaks past in a dizzy rush of color.

I have super speed! Since last time out, the bomb exploded after only a few turns, I'll likely be able to explore more of the site and maybe, finally, figure out what this game is all about. But all of that will have to wait until next time when I (probably) will wrap up the game and provide a final rating. Note that as I end this session, I have 71 points which is only one more than what I had before. I'm worried that I forgot something since I did more than one point's worth of new stuff but if so it should be obvious soon enough.


Time played: 2 hr 30 min
Total time: 10 hr 10 min

Inventory: bag of crumbs, small coin (20p), red boot (with roby), blue boot (with emerald), bandage, burial shroud, credit card, wristwatch, birdcage with lemming, broken coconut, spade, silver axe (not all carried with me to Trinity, but which I can fetch if needed)

Score: 71 of 100

8-Bit Lent


We should all have a good strategy prepared for the spiritual battle of Lent- things we are going to deny ourselves from eating, extra prayers we are going to say each day, sacrifices in terms of comfort and sacrifices in terms of media.

Lent is serious, it is the badge of being a true Catholic.

Maybe one sacrifice you might make in terms of video games is to give them up completely and to give up all reading up about them. That would be a great offering to the Lord.

Another idea, and something I am going to take up is to reduce myself to only playing 8-Bit games, (and, of course, to abstain from gaming media on YouTube).

8-Bit games certainly can be a bit of a penance, they can train us in patience, in denying immediate excitement and pleasure, and they are very very basic. They are like a bread and water fast in terms of gaming.

Give it a try. 40 days, only 8-Bit, and of course, only games you can play legally,

Speaking Of Siva: Touching The Feet Of God


By Jean-Pierre Dalbera. Source: Flickr

Speaking Of Siva is not a book that I intended to read. I was looking for Thich Nhat Hanh's Cry of Vietnam in the library, and while scanning the shelves, I came across this little-known book of Hindu poetry. I must confess that I don't know a whole lot about Hinduism. The closest things to Hindu literature I've read in my lifetime were Mohandas Gandhi's autobiography and Yann Martel's Life of Pi. This text was not the Bhavghad Gita, the Ramayana, or the Mahabharata. This was poetry. Yet through these poems, I hoped to understand something or another about the Hindu religion. After all, India is the most populated democracy in the world, to not know about their beliefs would be a mistake. Particularly in today's interconnected day and age.




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Speaking Of Siva is a collection translated by A.K. Ramanujan. The poems in question are called vacanas which means, "what is said." Ramanujan described them thusly,

"Vacana, as an active mode, stands in opposition to both the sruti and the smrti: not what is heard, but what is said; not remembered or received, but uttered here and now. To the saints, religion is not a spectator sport, a reception, a consumption; it is an experience of Now, a way of being. This distinction is expressed in the language of the vacanas, the forms that vacanas take. Though medieval Kannada was rich in native Dravidian metres, and in borrowed Sanskritic forms, no metrical line or stanza is used in the vacanas. The saints did not follow any of these models," (37).

These "saints" that Ramanujan speaks of are Basavanna, Devara Dasimayya, Mahadeviyakka, and Allama Prabu. Though names on the tongues of English speakers, no doubt. These saints protested against the Hindu mainstream, as well the apparent rigid dichotomy between Hinduism's 'great' and 'little' traditions. Ramanujan writes that the heart of vacana is a devotion to a god, or a particular form of that god, in this case, Siva. They reject the effectiveness of the 'great' Vedic texts, as well as the 'little' traditions of local gods and goddesses (25). This poetry must have been as radical for India as Saint Paul's preaching of Christianity was for the Greeks. These saints were off to evangelize, and redirect the flow of Hinduism onto a singly deity,

"If, as these saints believed, he also believes that his god is the true god, the only god, it becomes imperative to convert the misguided and bring light to the benighted. Missions are born. Bhakti religions proselytize, unlike classical Hinduism. Some of the incandescence of Virasavia poetry is the white heat of truth-seeing and truth-saying in a dark deluded world; their monotheism lashes out in an atmosphere of animism and polytheism," (27).

Bold and radical indeed, well perhaps from an Abrahamic perspective, where there exists only one God whose throne cannot be supplanted. I could hardly imagine the opposite occuring (a movement from monotheism to polytheism) in Christianity or Islam. I say this because while Hinduism is often construed as a polytheistic religion, the parameters of belief are so wide, that it allows for its adherents to believe in any number of gods, including none.

In introducing the book, Ramanujan opens with a vacana that he feels is best representative of the ideas celebrated by this protest movement within Hinduism. The poem is by Basavanna.

"The rich
will make temples for Siva.
What shall I,
a poor man,
do?

My legs are pillars,
the body the shrine,
the head a cupola
of gold.

Listen, O lord of the meeting rivers,
things standing shall fall,
but the moving ever shall stay," (19).

Having been raised a Catholic, the gods and goddesses of Hinduism are especially jarring. They are not ephemeral supreme rulers of omniscience like Yahweh or Allah nor do they take on the fragile human form of a poor carpenter. They are something out of the myths of ancient civilizations, or if you want to compare to an active religion, the kami of Shinto. These are very human, earthly gods, that fight in glorious battles and enjoy glorious sex. The above poem by Basavanna conveys just that, a desire to connect the divine (abstract) with the material (concrete). In fact, the linga, a physical symbol used to represent Shiva, is very phallic in appearance, and is often accompanied by the yoni, which represents the womb.

To be fair, even the Abrahamic religions have traits of this yearning to root the transcendent to the perceptible. The Song of Solomon in the Hebrew Bible took a very Hindu approach, using carnal sex as a metaphor for God's love. In the Gospels, there's the confounding figure of Christ, a contradiction, he was fully God and fully man. Even Hercules was only a demigod. In Islam, the Qur'an describes the afterlife as a paradise with running waters, fruitful gardens, and maidens who look after you called the Houri.

The above poem features a poor man, who cannot contribute to gifts to a temple, like a rich man, becomes himself a temple for Shiva. It is also suggested that being a temple means far more than simply going to a constructed one. Ramanujan explains, "The poem draws a distinction between making and being. The rich can only make temples. They may not be or become temples by what they do. Further what is made is a mortal artifact, but what one is is immortal," (20). Blessed are the poor, indeed. "Things standing shall fall, but the moving shall ever stay." The first shall be last and the last shall be first. I was often told in Sunday school that "my body is a temple". I don't know if any of my other Catholic friends thought about our bodies in such a visceral fashion.

I'll comment where I can, but I believe that with poetry, one should read and contemplate upon the letters for themselves. Meditate on when these bhakti poets felt, and feel it for yourself.

Basavanna (1106 AD---1167 AD)


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Ramanujan says that Basavanna had been dedicated to Shiva, the Lord of the Meeting Rivers, since the age of sixteen. He found the caste system of society and the rituals of his home to be shackling to his faith, so he left home in search of better spirituality. Basavanna soon found a guru, with whom he studied religious texts, like the Vedas. It is said that Shiva himself came to him in a dream and ordered Basavanna to find King Bijjala. Basavanna refused, not wanting to leave his spiritual bliss. So Shiva came to him again and said that he would appear in the mouth of a Sacred Bull. Sure enough, when Basavanna waited by the Stone Bull, Shiva came in the form of a linga on its tongue. This was all the sign that he needed to go onward. Basavanna got close to King Bijjala by marrying his uncle's daughter, Gangambike. His uncle, Baladeva, being the king's minister. Basavanna eventually rose to occupy the position once Baladeva died. Basavana's egalitarian teachings of disregarding social norms like caste and sex, and challenging orthodoxy and religious ritual, attracted many a devotee to him. This defiance, of course, angered many traditionalists. When a marriage between a former outcast and a former brahmin occurred, they were infuriated. Bijjala tried to sate them by sentencing the fathers of the bride and bridegroom to death, but this only further angered them to commit violence against 'state and society.' Basavanna was committed to non-violence, and tried to convert the extremists, but could not. This prompted him to leave in failure, before death. Bijjala was later assassinated (61-64).

In spite of his apparent "failure", Basavanna's ability to build an egalitarian society, especially in the 12th century, is very admirable. Prophets of Virashaiva describes him as, "...a mystic by temperament, an idealist by choice, a statesman by profession, a man of letters by taste, a humanist by sympathy and a social reformer by conviction," (Veerashaiva). Again, fighting as the caste system, sexism, and religious orthodoxy, are issues that Hindus must deal with in India to this day. Gandhi knew that fight, and spoke highly of Basavanna's commitments in 1924, "Eradication of untouchability and dignity of labour were among his core precepts. One does not find even shades of casteism in him. Had he lived during our times, he would have been a saint worthy of worship," (Singh). Though if we wish to truly understand the heart of this man, then we must read his vacanas.

Basavanna deals eloquently with the struggle of faith, in a way reminiscent of Job. Why should the pious suffer? He pleads to Shiva, but gets to direct answer. We are left to contemplate, as he questions his existence, why does one exist in a world of such darkness?

64

"Siva, you no mercy,
 Siva, you no heart.

"Why, why did you bring me to birth,
    wretch in this world,
    exile from the other?

"Tell me, lord,
 don't you have one more
 little tree or plant
 made just for me?" (74)

21


 "Father in my ignorance you brought me
  through mother's wombs,
  through unlikely worlds.

 "Was it wrong just to born,
    O lord?

 "Have mercy on me for being born
    once before,
      I give you my word,
      lord of the meeting rivers,
      never to be born again, (68).

62

"Don't make me hear all day,
    'Whose man, whose man, whose man is this?'

"Let me hear, 'This man is mine, mine,
    this man is mine,

"O lord of the meeting rivers,
   make me feel I'm a son,
   of the house," (70).

There is an explicit focus on the vanity of the material world in comparison to spiritual gifts. Poverty is a moral value, much like what the Gospels preach, for the body is a transient object, "sic transit gloria mundi."

111

"I went to fornicate
 but all I got was counterfeit,

"I went behind a ruined wall
 but scorpions stung me,

"The watchman who heard my screams
 just peeled off my clothes,

"I went home in shame,
 my husband raised weals on my back,

"All the rest, O lord of the meeting rivers,
 the king took for his fines," (75).

101

"When a whore with a child
 takes on a customer for money,

"neither child nor lecher
 will get enough of her.

"She'll go pat the child once,
 then go lie with the man once,

"neither here nor there.
 Love of money is relentless,

"my lord of the meeting rivers," (73).

161

"Before 
    the grey reaches the cheek
    the wrinkle the rounded chin
    and the body becomes a cage of bones:

"before
     with fallen teeth
     and bent back
     you are someone else's ward:

"before
     you drop your hand to the knee
     and clutch a staff:

"before
     age corrodes
     your form:

"before
     death touches you:

         "worship
          our lord
          of the meeting rivers!" (78).

132

"You can make them talk
 if the serpent 
 has stung
 them.

"You can make them talk
 if they're struck 
 by an evil planet.

"But you can't make them talk
 if they're struck dumb 
 by riches.

     "Yet when Poverty the magician
      enters, they'll speak
      at once,

         "O lord of the meeting rivers," (77).

The uniqueness of the human being, and a possible touch of bisexuality,

125

"See-saw watermills bow their heads.
 So what?
 Do they get to be devotees
 to the Master?

"The tongs join hands.
 So what?
 Can they be humble in service
 to the Lord?

"Parrots recite.
 So what?
 Can they read the Lord?

"How can the slaves of the Bodiless God,
 Desire,
            know the way
            our Lord's men move
            or the stance of their standing?" (76).

703

"Look here, dear fellow:
 I wear these men's clothes
 only for you.

"Sometimes I am man,
 sometimes I am woman,

"O lord of the meeting rivers
 I'll make wars for you
 but I'll be your devotee's bride," (87).

The ecstasy of the bosom of Shiva,

8

"Look, the world, in a swell
 of waves, is beating upon my face,

"Why should it rise to my heart,
 tell me,
 O tell me, why is it
 rising now to my throat?
 Lord,
 how can I tell you anything
 when it is risen high
 over my head
 lord lord
 listen to my cries
 O lord of the meeting rivers
 listen," (67).

847

"When
 like a hailstone crystal,
 like a waxwork image
 the flesh melts in pleasure
    how can I tell you?

"The waters of joy
broke the banks
and ran out of my eyes

"I touched and joined
my lord of the meeting rivers
How can I talk to anyone
of that?" (89).

Basavanna lives on, but not only through his poetry, it seems. Though his attempts at social reform failed during his lifetime, his philosophy would have an enduring impact on Indian culture and history,

"The movement initiated by Basava through 'Anubhava Mantapa' became the basis of religion of love and faith. It gave rise to a system of ethics and education at once simple and exalted. It inspired ideals of social and religious freedom, such as no previous faith of India had done. In the medieval age which was characterized by inter communal jealousy, it helped to shed a ray of light and faith on the homes and hearts of people. It rendered the Hindu religion all embracing in its sympathy, catholic in its outlook, a perennial fountain of delight and inspiration. The movement gave a literature of considerable value in the vernacular language of the country, the literature which attained the dignity of a classical tongue. It eliminated the barriers of caste and removed untouchability. It raised the untouchable equal to that of the high born. It gave sanctity to the family relations and raised the status of womanhood. It undermined the importance of rites and rituals, of fasts and pilgrimages. It encouraged learning and contemplation on God by means of love and faith. It deplored the excesses of polytheism and developed the plan of monotheism. It tended in many ways to raise the nation generally to a higher level of capacity both in thought and action," (Kumarswamiji).


Devara Dasimayya (10th Century AD)


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Ramanujan says that Devara Dasimayya's writings would later be an influence on Basavanna's poetry. Dasimayya connected to Shiva through the hero of the Ramayana, Rama, so the end of all his poems are addressed, Ramanatha. Dasimayya did ascetic penance in the forests, when Shiva himself came and told him not to punish himself as a recluse, but to work in the world is the greater worship. Dasimayya became a weaver. Dasimayya became very successful in converting people to Shiva, so much so that legends were bulit about him, that he turned sand into rice, gave a dead boy life, and brought lingas from nothing. At the end of his life, he spoke to Ramanatha and said, "I've lived my life and done everything by your grace. Now you must return me to yourself." (91-94).

Dasimayya's sentiments on gender fludity would later be echoed by Basavanna in his 704th vacana. Ramanujan said of Dasimayya, that, "In his protest against traditional dichotomies, he rejects also the differences between man and woman as superficial," (26). The question of gender is not a new one, but one that people have been asking for years.

133

"If they see 
 breasts and long hair coming
 they call it woman,

"if beard and whiskers
 they call it man

"but, look, the self that hovers 
 in between
 is neither man 
 nor woman

"O Ramanatha," (110).

144

"Suppose you cut a tall bamboo
 in two;
 make the bottom piece a woman
 the headpiece a man;
 rub them together
 till they kindle:
                       tell me now
 the fire that's born,
 is it male or female,

                       "O Ramanatha?" (110).

These radical saints, and their opposition to specific times and rituals is also exemplified by Dasimayya, who integrates Shiva into every part of his existence. Ramanujan wrote, "Religions set apart certain times and places as specially sacred: rituals and worship are performed at appointed times, pilgrimages are undertaken to well-known holy places. There is a holy map as well as a holy calendar. If you die in Benares, sinner though you are, you will go straight to heaven," (26).

44

"For what 
 shall I handle a dagger
 O lord?

"What can I pull it out of,
 or stab it in,

"when You are all the world,

"O Ramanatha?" (100).

121

"God of my clan,
 I'll not place my feet
 but where your feet 
 have stood before:
 I've no feet
 of my own.

"How can the immoralists
 of this world know
 the miracle, the oneness
 of your feet
 and mine,

"Ramanatha?" (106).

98

"To the utterly at-one with Siva

"there's no dawn,
 no new moon,
 no noonday,
 nor equinoxes,
 nor sunsets,
 nor full moons;

"his front yard
 is the true Benares,

"O Ramanatha," (105).

For Dasimayya the "spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak," but it is also in the flesh that he finds Shiva.

23

"In the mother's womb
 the child does not know
 his mother's face

"nor can she ever know
 his face.

"the man in the world's illusion
 does not know the Lord

"nor the Lord him,

"Ramanatha," (97).

123

"Bodied,
 one will hunger.

"Bodied,
 one will lie.

"O you, don't you rib
 and taunt me
 again
 for having a body:

"body Thyself for once
 like me and see
 what happens,

"O Ramanatha," (107).

120

"I'm the one who has the body,
 you're the one who holds the breath.

"You know the secret of my body,
 I know the secret of your breath.

"That's why your body
 is in mine,

"You know
 and I know, Ramanatha,

"the miracle

"of your breath
 in my body," (106).

127

"Fire can burn
 but cannot move.

"Wind can move
 but cannot burn.

"Till fire joins wind
 it cannot take a step.

"Do men know
 it's like that
 with knowing and doing?" (108).

The reality of Shiva is self-evident in the natural world, and how Dasimayya perceives it.

4

"You balanced the globe
    on the waters
    and kept it from melting away,

"you made the sky stand
     without pillar or prop,

"O Ramanatha,
    which gods could have
    done this?" (97).

45

"The five elements
 have become one.

"The sun and the moon,
 O Rider of the Bull,
 aren't they really
 your body?

"I stand,
 look on,
 you're filled
 with the worlds.

"What can I hurt now
 after this, Ramanatha?" (101).

87

"Whatever It was

"that made this earth
 the base,
 the world its life,
 the wind its pillar,
 arranged the lotus and the moon,
 and covered it all with folds
 of sky,

"with Itself inside,

"to that Mystery
 indifferent to differences,

"to It I pray,
 Ramanatha," (103).

131

"Ramanatha,
 who can know the beauty
 of the Hovering One

"who's made Himself from
 and of space
 and colors?" (109).


Mahadeviyakka (1130 AD---1160 AD)




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Mahadeviyakka, also called Akka Mahadevi, is unique amongst the poets listed so far, because she is the only woman. Ramanujan writes that she considered her moment of birth to be her initiation into Shiva worship at age ten. She referred to Shiva as "Lord, white as jasmine," and even betrothed herself to him, though this didn't stop suitors from approaching. A king, and further an unbeliever, Kausika, sought her hand. It is not certain if they married, but Ramanujan thinks it to be likely. It does seem clear from her writings, however, that she renounced carnal love, in favor of a spiritual love with her Lord. As proof of this, she cast off all of her clothes, and covered herself in the tresses of her hair. In an effort to get closer to Shiva she went to a school where Basavanna and Allama Prabhu. Allama asked her why she replaced her clothes with her hair, and she answered in poem,

"Till the fruit is ripe inside
 the skin will not fall off.
 I'd a feeling it would hurt you
 if I displayed the body's seals of love.
 O brother, don't tease me
 needlessly. I'm given entire
 into the hands of my lord
 white as jasmine."

She was accepted. Yet being a woman in a patriarchal society, she always sought to break free from her bodily limits. According to legend, she died "in oneness with Shiva" in her twenties, (111-114). Mahadeviyakka internalized her "Lord, white as jasmine" to the utmost, The Hindu has described her outlook thus, "As she continued to meditate, Akka's concept of Chenna Mallikarjuna changed from that of the Puranic Shiva to the formless Divine — the one who pervaded her soul. She saw the Absolute in everything. Every tree was the kalpavriksha, every bush was the Sanjeevani, every place was a teertha, every water body contained Amritha and every pebble was the chintamani gem. Her very breath became His fragrance. His form became hers. Having known Him, there was nothing else to know. She became the bee that drank the nectar of Chenna Mallikarjuna, and dissolved into it. What remained was – " Nothing, none whatsoever"!" (Ramadevi).

Some days, Shiva is lost and Mahadeviyakka must chase after him.

50

"When I didn't know myself
  where were you?

"Like the colour in the gold,
 you were in me.

"I saw in you,
 lord white as jasmine,
 the paradox of your being
 in me
 without showing a limb," (119).

60

"Not seeing you
 in the hill, in the forest,
 froom tree to tree
 I roamed,
               searching, gasping:
               Lord, my Lord, come
               show me your kindness!

   "till I met your men
    and found you.
                          You hide
    lest I seek and find.
    Give me a clue,
    O lord
    white as jasmine,
                             to your hiding places," (119).

73

"O twittering birds,
 don't you know? don't you know?

"O swans on the lakeshore,
 don't you know? don't you know?

"O high-singing koils,
 don't you know? don't you know?

"O circling swooping bees,
 don't you know? don't you know?

"O peacocks in the caverns,
 don't you know?
 don't you know?

    "Tell me if you know:
                                    where is He,
      my lord
      white as jasmine?" (121).

75

"You are the forest

"you are all the great trees
    in the forest

"you are bird and beast
     playing in and out
     of all the trees

    "O lord white as jasmine
     filling and filled by all

    "why don't you
     show me your face?" (122).

12

"My body is dirt,
 my spirit is space: 
                            which
 shall I grab, O lord? How,
 and what,
              shall I think of you?
                  Cut through
                  my illusions,
                  lord white as jasmine," (116).

17

"Like a silkworm weaving
 her house with love
 from her marrow,
                           and dying
 in her body's threads
 winding tight, round
 and round,
                 I burn
 desiring what the heart desires.

"Cut through, O lord,
 my heart's greed,
 and show me
 your way out,

"O lord white as jasmine," (116).

Being the self-proclaimed wife of Shiva, she writes yearning cries for his love. In these writings we see, in part, the challenge of renouncing "carnal knowledge" for "spiritual knowledge."

79

"Four parts of the day
 I grieve for you.
 Four parts of the night
 I'm mad for you.

"I lie lost
 sick for you, night and day,
    O lord white as jasmine.

"Since your love 
 was planted,
 I've forgotten hunger,
 thirst, and sleep," (124).

114

"Husband inside,
 lover outside.
 I can't manage them both.

"This world,
 and that other,
 cannot manage them both.

"O lord white as jasmine

"I cannot hold in one hand
 both the round nut
 and the long bow," (127).

283

"I love the Handsome One:
     he has no death
     decay nor form
     no place or side
     no end nor birthmarks.
     I love him O mother. Listen.

"I love the Beautiful One
    with no bond nor fear
    no clan no land
    no landmarks
    for his beauty.

"So my lord, white as jasmine, is my husband.

"Take these husbands who die,
     decay, and feed them
     to your kitchen fires!" (134).

317

"Riding the blue sapphire mountains
 wearing moonstone for slippers
 blowing long horns
 O Siva
 when shall I
 crush you on my pitcher breasts

"O lord white as jasmine
 when do I join you
 stripped of body's shame
 and heart's modesty?" (136).

319

"What do
 the barren know
 of birthpangs?

"Stepmothers,
 what do they know
 of loving care?

"How can the unwounded
 know the pain
 of the wounded?

"O lord white as jasmine
 your love's blade stabbed
 and broken in my flesh,

"I writhe.
 O mothers
 how can you know me?" (138).

323

"I look at the road
 for his coming.
 If he isn't coming,
 I pine and waste away.
 If he is late,
 I grow lean

"O mother, if he is away
 for a night,
 I'm like the lovebird
 with nothing
 in her embrace," (140).

324

"Better than meeting
 and mating all the time
 is the pleasure of mating once
 after being far apart.

"When he's away
  I cannot wait
  to get s glimpse of him.

"Friend, when will I have it
 both ways,
 be with Him
 yet not with Him,
 my lord white as jasmine?" (140)

Though "spiritual knowledge" of Shiva has its sensations.

65

"If sparks fly
 I shall think my thirst and hunger quelled.

"If the skies tear down
 I shall think them pouring for my bath.

"If a hillside slide on me
 I shall think it flower for my hair.

"O lord white as jasmine, if my head falls from my shoulders
 I shall think it your offering," (120).

88

"He bartered my heart,
    looted my flesh,
    claimed as tribute
    my pleasure,
    took over
    all of me.

"I'm the woman of love
 for my lord, white as jasmine," (125).

120

"Breath for fragrance,
 who needs flowers?

"with peace, patience, forgiving and self-command,
 who needs the Ultimate Posture?

"The whole world become oneself
 who needs solitude,

"O lord white as jasmine," (128).

 199

"For hunger,
    there is the town's rice in the begging bowl.

"For thirst,
    there are tanks, streams, wells.

"For sleep,
    there are the ruins of temples.

"For soul's company
     I have you, O lord
 white as jasmine," (132).

69

"O mother I burned
 in a flameless fire

"O mother I suffered
 a bloodless wound

"mother I tossed
 without a pleasure:

"loving my lord white as jasmine
 I wandered through unlikely worlds," (121).


Allama Prabhu (12th Century AD)


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Ramanujan writes that there are various traditions surrounding Allama Prabhu, including one that sees him as Shiva in flesh. Harihara, a fifteenth century poet, wrote one of these many biographies about Allama. In his version, the poet is a temple-drummer who falls in love with the women Kamalate. She soon dies in sickness, and he wanders in grief, calling out for his dead wife. In his travels, Allama saw the golden cupola (or kalasa) of a temple. He excavated the whole area. In the temple, he found a yogi in a trance with a linga of Shiva. The yogi's name was Animisayya, and handed Allama the linga. The moment he did so, he died, but transfered his enlightenment onto Allama, who ends all of his vacanas, by addressing Shiva as "Lord of Caves". His contemporaries, including Basavanna and Mahadeviyakka, considered him to be a master of the vacanas. This title lives on in his very name, for Basava was given the title Anna, meaning  "elder brother", while Mahadevi was given the title Akka, meaning "elder sister", but Allama was given the title Prabhu, meaning, "Master." Allama, like the other four saints, rejected ritual worship, but often questioned their integrity. He brought up Basavanna's giving in the world's temptations, even while performing good works. He mocked Mahadeviyakka for flaunting her nudity publicly, yet covering her flesh in the tresses of her own hair. It is said that Allama achieved enlightenment through complete self-emptying. His body became the spirit (143-146).

Well, they call Allama Prabhu "The Master" for a reason. His poetry is the best written, the best refined. He has a good handle of the vacana style, and uses it to maximum effect. Once you finish reading one of his works, you are left thinking about the unique and strange metaphor it presents. Sometimes, I felt like I was reading through Buddhist koans, which at times, expressed the limits of language to describe certain aspects of reality. I'm not sure if that was Allama's intention, but I can sense him trying to push the vacana style as far as he could.

59

"Where was the mango tree,
 where the koilbird?

"when were they kin?

"Mountain gooseberry
 and sea salt:
                  when 
 were they kin?

    "and when was I
     kin to the Lord
     of Caves?" (149).

109

"If mountains shiver in the cold
 with what
 will they wrap them?

"If space goes naked
 with what 
 shall they clothe it?

"If the lord's men become worldlings
 where will I find the metaphor,

    "O Lord of Caves," (151).

213

"With a whole temple
 in this body
 where's the need
 for another?

"No one asked
 for two.

"O Lord of Caves,
 if you are stone,
 what am I?" (153)

429

"When the honey-bee came
  I saw the smell of flowers
  run.

"O what miracles!

"Where the heart went
  I saw the brain
  run.

"When the god came,
  I saw the temple run," (157).

556

"If it rains fire
     you have to be as the water;

"if it is a deluge of water
    you have to be as the wind;

"if it is the Great Flood,
    you have to be as the sky;

"and if it is the Very Last Flood of all the worlds,
     you have to give up self

"and become the Lord," (162).

616

"Who can know green grass flames
        seeds of stone

       "reflectios of water
        smell of the wind

       "the sap of fire
        the taste of sunshine on the tongue

       "and the lights in oneself

"except your men?"
(162).

668

"The wind sleeps
  to lullabies of sky.

"Space drowses,
  infinity gives it suck
  from her breast.

"The sky is silent.
 The lullaby is over.

"The Lord is
  as if He were not," (164).

675

"Light 
 devoured darkness.

"I was alone
 inside.

"Shedding
 the visible dark

"I
 was Your target

"O Lord of Caves," (164).

775

"A running river
     is all legs.

"A burning fire
     is mouths all over.

"A blowing breeze
     is all hands.

"So, lord of the caves,
 for your men,
 every limb is Symbol," (165).

802

"Whoever knew
 that It is body of body,

"breath of breath
 and feeling of feeling?

"Thinking that it's far,
 it's near,
 it's out here
 and in there,

"they tire themselves out," (166).


Now Having Spoken With Shiva

In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis wrote that the Christian religion wasn't simply about being a nice person, but about becoming a new man,

"For mere improvement is not redemption, though redemption always improves people even here and now and will, in the end, improve them to a degree we cannot yet imagine. God became man to turn creatures into sons: not simply to produce better men of the old kind but to produce a new kind of man. It is not like teaching a horse to jump better and better but like turning a horse into a winged creature," (216).

A similar vibe can be felt through the these vacanas, Satsthala Siddhanta writes,

"The vacanas and later Virasavia texts in Kannada and Sanskrit speak of the mystical process as a successsion of stages, a ladder of ascent, a metamorphosis from egg to larva to pupa to the final freedom of winged being," (169).

What have I learned from these four saints who worshiped Shiva? Perhaps it was upon reading their verses, as vivacious as they were at their first composition, that these words affirmed for me the reality of "spirituality", if I may use the term. Not so much the spirituality of the transcendent, that higher beings like Shiva exist, but more so the internal spirituality of the human soul. What these four felt, I think, was real. We all feel it, "the numinous" as William Golding would say. For most people our sense of spirituality is provoked by an image of the cosmos from the Hubble Telescope. For them, it came from poverty, the cave, the honey-bee. We need not adopt all of their practices, or even their god. Akka Mahadevi, for instance, was a great poet, but her obsessive love for Shiva was utter madness. What I'm trying to get across is that these four found a certain peace of mind in their meditations, from which they were able to redefine how they saw reality. Such is the nature of poetry itself, to provoke thought or feeling in each written observation. To change the way we see the world's ordinary processes. To view life as a new man.

Perhaps I've learned something about the Hindu religion.


972

"Looking for your light,
 I went out:

   "it was like the sudden dawn
    of a million million suns,

   "a ganglion of lightnings
    for my wonder.

   "O Lord of Caves,
    if you are light,
    there can be no metaphor," (168).

- Allama Prabhu



Bibliography

Basavanna, Devara Desimayya, Mahadeviyakka, Allama Prabhu; ed. A.K. Ramanujan. Speaking Of Siva. Penguin Books: Baltimore, Maryland, 1973. 19-20, 25-27, 37, 61-64, 67-94, 97-114, 116-140, 143-145, 149-169. Print.

Kumarswamiji, H.H. Mahatapasvi Shiri. "Basava - The Great Socio-Religious Reformer." Prophets of Virashaivism. Veerashaiva, 2015. Web. http://www.virashaiva.com/basava-the-great-socio-religious-reformer/


Lewis, C.S. Mere Christianity. Harper Collins: San Francisco, 1952. 216. Print.

Ramadevi, B. "Akka Mahadevi: Shiva in her soul." The Hindu, February 24, 2014. Web. http://www.thehindu.com/features/metroplus/akka-mahadevi-shiva-in-her-soul/article5722583.ece

Sing, Yadu. "800 years later, Basava philosophy still relevant." The Indian Sun. Web. http://www.theindiansun.com.au/800-years-later-basava-philosophy-remains-relevant/